Cubs Call Up Guy I've Never Heard Of With Wicked (Note: Fake) Stats

If the Cubs really were hiding a player with a 510-0 career record, 1.02 ERA and 125 saves, he probably wouldn't have allowed three runs (plus two inherited runners) on seven hits in 5.1 innings in his Major League debut. Maybe that explains the 489 hits in 132 innings pitched.

Well, at least he improved on that outrageous 3.73 WHIP.

via The Baseball Cube