Milwaukee Not Alone As NBA Punchlines

The Big Lead, one of the premier sports blogs and partial inspiration for this Web log, pointed out the hot mess that is the Milwaukee Bucks. They lost their best player, Charlie V, for nothing and traded its second best player and got less than that in return.

However, the Bucks aren't alone in their ineptitude, and they could be a sleeper squad for the eight spot in the East if Michael Redd and Andrew Bogut stay healthy and Brandon Jennings excels at the point.

Here are five teams that are worse off than Milwaukee.

1. Memphis Grizzlies. Last season, the Grizzlies were out performed by their collegiate roommates, who won 33 games last season. The Grizz won only 24, despite having Rudy Gay and O.J. Mayo mostly because they employed guys named Darko and Marko in addition to a guy who played his college ball at Colgate.

Now, the team that cried poor and traded Pau Gasol to the Lakers for a steaming pile of crap, just inherited one of the NBA's worst contracts in Zach Randolph.

You don't need to be smart enough to take Derrick Rose's SAT to realize how much trouble this franchise is in. Well, at least there's the BBQ and Beale Street.

2. Minnesota Timberwolves. Al Jefferson should be showered with gifts fit for a king, if not for averaging 22 points and 11 boards since finding Minnesota, then definitely for dealing with a franchise so inept, the Washington Nationals think it's funny.

Throughout the Mocking of the NBA Draft segment, I noted the Timberpups hadn't had a good PG since Starbury skipped town. Someone apparently read that and took it to heart as the T-Wolves drafted three point guards in the first round, and another in the second. Even though one of them wants no part of the Twin Cities, one of the other three two other guys has got to be good, right?

3. Indiana Pacers. I cannot believe that this team won 36 games last season. I guess that is a testament of how much of a badass Danny Granger is because no point guard, no post presence and the Association's worst head coach means a win total in the teens in any other situation.

Once upon a time, the Pacers were one of the Eastern Conference's powerhouses, now their only claim to fame is having the best arena in basketball.

4. Sacramento Kings. It wasn't too long ago that this franchise was a Predrag Stojakovic three-ball from knocking off Kobe, Shaq & the rest of the Lakers. Since then, this franchise has fallen on hard times, so much so, the city's best basketball player is its mayor.

Kevin Martin is nice and Tyreke Evans will be a welcome addition. But how likely is the front line of Spencer Hawes/Jason Thompson to succeed? Probably as likely as Stojakovich is to make an open three in a Game 7 of a Western Conference Finals game.

5. Toronto Raptors. Quick, name a player on the Raptors other than Chris Bosh. I'll give you hint: it isn't Tracy McGrady or Vince Carter. If you said Jose Calderon, then you would be correct. But would you even know about him had there not been a glaring need for a point guard on your fantasy hoops squad?

Toronto will lose Bosh in the summer of 2010 and the only players with any name recognition would be Calderon and DeMar DeRozan, who just won't be able to handle life without Song Girls or Lil' Romeo.

Let's make a deal ... a bad one. No, two bad ones.

Joe Dumars better hope that Rip Hamilton is looking towards Utah. A trade for Carlos Boozer would help both teams and make up for Dumars early mistake.

Imagine you have $20 million to spend on NBA players such as Hedo Turkoglu, Trevor Ariza, Lamar Odom, Shawn Marion, Paul Millsap and Ron Artest. 

Now imagine you took that $20 million and signed Ben Gordon and Charlie Villanueva to long-term deals that combine to about $98 million. And now Plax yourself. 

Don't get me wrong, both Gordon and Villanueva are both very good basketball players. Gordon can shoot the lights out at times and comes through in clutch situations. Villanueva is a 6-foot-10 forward that can handle the ball like a shooting guard and stretch the defense. 

The problem is Gordon is undersized, which causes him to have more cold nights than one would like. And since he doesn't play much defense, he is pretty much useless when his shot is off. Villanueva, as stated before, is 6'10". But his rebounding is often invisible and his low-post defense is non-existent. 

So there you have it Pistons fans. A $98 million rebuilding process brings you two players with a lot of good skills and absolutely no chance of making a team an immediate contender. Patience is a virtue and Joe Dumars clearly did not have it. He could have tried to pursue other options in this free agency period, or better yet, signed just one of the players between Gordon and Villanueva and saved the rest for next summer for the top-quality talent that will be available. 

And while Dumars has made some terrible financial decisions this summer, all is not lost. Word has it the Utah Jazz will do all they can to sign Paul Millsap so they can send off Carlos Boozer. If the Pistons want to improve the 2009-10 version of their team, they should think long and hard about trying to convince the Jazz to trade one expiring contract for another. 

A Rip Hamilton for Carlos Boozer deal would give both teams financial flexibility while filling in immediate needs. The Pistons desperately need a presence down low and need to bust up an over-filled backcourt, while the Jazz need to let Millsap take his place in the rotation while getting a serious threat at the two-guard position. 

If Dumars can make that deal happen, then all was not lost this summer for the Pistons. Either way, best of luck to Gordon and Villanueva because I like them both and I really do think they are good basketball players so I hope they don't draw to much heat from Detroit fans and media. 

That's one bad deal done, are you ready for another? Good, let's do it again.

Imagine you are one of the 29 teams in the NBA that doesn't have Zach Randolph and the $33 million, two-year contract he comes with along with a few guns and DUIs. 

Now imagine you willingly bring him to your team by trading one of your players. Now Plax yourself. 

The Memphis Grizzlies looked like they were doing things right for a while. They have Rudy Gay, OJ Mayo and Marc Gasol. They drafted a center with some questions, but at least one that would provide strong defense. They were looking to get young and athletic. 

But now they trade Quentin Richardson, who would have been a great sixth man for them, and take on Zach Randolph. I only had a brief conversation with Randolph, but while he was a gentleman to me, it's clear to see how he would be a terrible practice player and a cancer in the clubhouse. 

While he might get double-doubles, he does not do it in a way that helps the team wins. He will play about 10 minutes of inspired basketball per game before just going through the motions. He doesn't care too much about helping rookies and seems more interested in what he is going to do after the game is over. 

He is not the player a team should take when they are trying to instill a winning attitude and work ethic in the clubhouse. 

Oh yeah, and that $33 million over two years is going to make it difficult for the Grizzlies to make a play at a 2010 free agent. 

Here's hoping your team does a little better this summer. 

Cubs Fans, Your Savior Is Here. His Name: Jeff Baker. Yeah, I Don't Know Him Either.

Jeff Baker's the name and utility is his game. The Cubs acquired Baker, formerly of the Colorado Rockies this morning in exchange for Alberto Alburquerque, who will be immediately traded to the Dodgers minor league affiliate for a Duff Man poster. Oh yeah!

In a corresponding move, the Cubs have designated Ryan Freel for assignment. No word whether or not Farney is checking Craigslist for job openings.

Baker has seen time at both corner infield and corner outfield positions, and might be best suited as a second baseman. Somewhere, Mark DeRosa fanboys just found themselves a new crush.

A quick glance over at his baseball-reference.com page makes me think he is a really poor man's DeRosa. Stats say Baker is a lefty masher with a career .902 OPS against southpaws in his career. Manager Lou Piniella might want to keep this guy away from righties, where he is a career .244 hitter with a yawn-inspiring OPS of .696.

I guess he's better than Ryan Freel, who OPSed .369 in 14 games as a Cub. To put that in perspective, Joe Mauer's batting average was .423 after his first 14 games this season.

This trade reeks of a high-risk, high-reward deal. It is hard to ignore Baker's .601 career OPS away from Coors Field and harder to justify acquiring a Rockies hitter, taking him out of that hitters paradise.

But I admit that I like his career slash stats in the second half. Tough to knock a guy who hits .284 with an .877 OPS in 246 second-half plate appearances.

Cubs Aquire Jeff Baker, DFA Ryan Freel [Yahoo! Sports and ESPN via MLB Trade Rumors]

Free Agent Highs and Lows

The Chicago Blackhawks epitomized life in a free-agent market on Wednesday. The Hawks signed all-star Marian Hossa to a twelve-year deal and also lost two popular veterans in Nikolai Khabibulin and Martin Havlat.

Hossa will add leadership to a talented, young core. He also has the ability at right wing to put the puck in the net, having scored 40 goals for the Red Wings last season.

It has been an interesting ride for Hossa the last few seasons. He left Pittsburgh to join Detroit, the team that beat the Penguins in the 2008 Stanley Cup. Then, those same Penguins beat Hossa and Detroit for this year's title. The all-star will now come to a Hawks team that lost to Detroit this season in the conference finals, hoping that Chicago can win him a title.

Chicago will have to work for the championship without last year's number-one goaltender. Khabibulin was signed by the Edmonton Oilers, leaving the Blackhawks with Cristobal Huet as the likely starter in net next season.

Also, Havlat signed with the Minnesota Wild. The Wild lost Marian Gaborik and now have Havlat to replace him. The Hawks are essentially replacing Havlat with Hossa, which seems like a pretty good trade to me. Yet, it just goes to show the ups-and-downs of an offseason. You cannot keep everybody and general manager Dale Tallon hopes he pushed the right buttons again.

Tallon has made the Hawks into a contending franchise and one that people in Chicago care about again. The fans loved Khabi and Havlat, but they will come to love Hossa as well. They obviously didn't like him with Detroit, but moving over to the Windy City will make the United Center fans excited.

You can also say Chicago and Detroit made a two-sport trade. The Blackhawks get Hossa while the NBA's Chicago Bulls lose Ben Gordon to the Pistons. Free agency is fun, and it is also a roller coaster.

Ben Gordon Agrees To Deal With Pistons, Which Seems To Be Similar To The One He Once Rejected From The Bulls

I wonder if Ben Gordon realizes he has to live in Detroit. For $11 million per, I would not be surprised if General Motors or Ford asked Mr. Gordon for an additional bailout.

And unless the Gar Foreman pulls a rabbit out of his hat, be prepared for a starting line-up of Rose, Salmons, Deng, Thomas, Noah.

Eighth seed, here we come. Again.

Pistons Strike Deal With Gordon [Yahoo! Sports]

Welcome Marian Hossa, Goodbye Khabibulin

After such an amazing season last year that included a winter classic game at Wrigley Field, a conference-final appearance and an attendance record, you had to figure the Chicago Blackhawks' front-office had more up their sleeve during the offseason. As much of a revival as the season was for the Hawks, losing to the Detroit Red Wings in the conference finals was not going to sit well in their stomach.

So, what did general manager Dale Tallon do today? He signed Marian Hossa from the Red Wings, a four time all-star that scored 40 goals in the regular season this past year. Hossa plays the same position, right wing, that current Blackhawk and free agent Martin Havlat plays. Yes, that may mean Havlat could be out of Chicago, but maybe Tallon can sign him to a short-term deal as well.

We'll see what comes from that, but for now, the focus is on who the Blackhawks have for sure. They will have Hossa for a very long time as he signed a 12-year deal. Offense should not be an issue for the Hawks, who also have young stars Patrick Kane, Jonathan Toews, and many more exciting players that can put the puck in the net.

The Blackhawks did lose goalie Nikolai Khabibulin today as well. Khabi signed with the Edmonton Oilers, which means most likely that Cristobal Huet will be in net for Chicago next season. Huet played in half the regular season games last year, but Khabibulin started all but one in the playoffs. That was due to injury, and in the game that Huet started, he kept the Hawks in it against Detroit before the Wings won in overtime to take the series.

He clearly was the backup, but now he will try and at least come close to the success that Khabi had last year. Khabi was released in the offseason, picked up again by the Hawks, and helped lead the team to the conference finals.

Reports had Tallon looking to trade Huet this week and re-sign Khabibulin. Well, the GM will probably have to keep Huet.

Maybe Huet will be motivated, like Khabi was last year, by the team wanting him to leave. I know one thing...any bit of goaltending will do, because with Hossa joining an already talented group of scorers, the Hawks will be lighting up the lamp a good amount next year.

A Sneak Peak At The Boss' Birthday Wish List

NBA writer Jeff basically hit it right on the head with a good chunk of his blog about what he would get Luis for his birthday. Makes me wonder if Phil Rogers and Kevin Gregg would cuddle under a tree and which one would be the big spoon.

Luckily though, I was able to get into The Boss' e-mail wish list. There were some things that I won't mention here, this is supposed to be the kind of blog an entire family could read after eating dinner. They sure as hell aren't reading newspapers, that's for sure.

So, without further ado. Luis' birthday wishlist.

1. A bakers dozen Erin Andrews clones. It's not what you think. Well, maybe. See, Luis has an odd obsession with the Sideline Princess, climaxing with her first, last and what will likely be only appearance at Southern Illinois. But what would The Man do with a dozen EA clones? He'd turn them into the Chicago Bears cheerleaders, the Honey Bears. Someone has got cheer on Jay Cutler, right? As for the 13th, he'd keep for himself, enslaved in a cage wearing a cheerleader uniform, no doubt.

2. All charges against Plaxico Burress to be dropped. Catch is a fun game, according to Cutler. And according to Bears fans, Cutler's teammates couldn't catch a cold with stick 'em on their hands. That's why Luis wished for the NYPD to drop their case and for Roger Goodell to turn a blind eye to the entire situation. Kind of like how the LAPD treated the Tupac murder case.

3. A genie in an Old Style bottle. And with his three wishes? Orlando Hudson instead of Aaron Miles. Bobby Abreu instead of Milton Bradley. K-Rod instead of Kevin Gregg. (Hey, they're called wishes for a reason.)

4. The Blackhawks get an established goal scorer. Apparently, John McDonough also got the leaked copy of Luis' birthday wish list.

5. UNC head coach Roy Williams' Carolina blue sports coat. Luis already has that blinding white coat (it would explain why SIU is 0-2 when he wears it) Maybe, finally, he'll shut up about Wayne Ellington and that whole North Carolina mess.

Marian Hossa To The Blackhawks. Thanks For The B-Day Gift Mr. McDonough!

Marian Hossa is a Chicago Blackhawk!

When I was a kid, I used to celebrate many birthdays at Wrigley Field watching the Cubs. In addition to being the die-hard Cubs fan that I am, I always enjoyed the giveaways. Cubs promotions were always top-notch thanks to a gentleman named John McDonough.

Johnny Mac now works for the Chicago Blackhawks hockey organ-I-zation. And his latest gift for me and the rest of the Blackhawks hockey fans?

Marian Hossa.

One of our hockey guys will have more on this later. As for yours truly, it's all about celebrations!

Blackhawks Sign Marian Hossa, Some Other Former Wings Guy [Chicago Tribune]

A Very Merry Birthday List

For Luis C. Medina's birthday, I would like to send Phil Rogers and Kevin Gregg to this small island-nation ... permanently

Here at TBDS, I am the NBA guy. Normally I would write something exciting about the free agency period going on, like how there is going to be a UConn reunion in Motown in a matter of hours. 

But today is even more important than the beginning of NBA free agency. It is the birthday of the founder of The Big Dead Sidebar and sports blogger extraordinaire (and by that I mean the best sports blogger I have ever read), Luis C. Medina. 

So since it is his birthday, I would like to take this time to compile a list of birthday wishes I would have made reality had I been given the chance. 

1. Bryant the Bull: When Kobe says "You might as well buy a Bulls jersey," referencing his desire to play in the Windy City, than it should be a no-brainer to do everything possible to make a move for the best player in the NBA. Unfortunately, it was a brainer for Chicago's front office. They couldn't part ways with Luol Deng and bit the bullet for it. 

Had I been general manager, Mr. Medina would be one happy basketball fan right now. I would have traded Ben Gordon, Luol Deng and Tyrus Thomas with a future pick for No. 24. Bryant would have come to the Bulls where he could play alongside Derrick Rose and create chaos in the East. But instead Deng is always hurt, Gordon is leaving for nothing in return and Thomas is still searching for consistency. The end result ... Rose is forced to carry a team and Luis is a sad birthday boy. 

2. Peavy rocks the Cubbie blue: Unlike the NBA, there is no salary cap in the MLB. Why the Cubs did not push harder to get the Cy Young winner in their rotation is beyond me. Now the Cubs are 36-38 and it's no longer early in the season. Luis is frustrated and it's all cause Chicago just couldn't part ways with Carlos Marmol or top-prospects or anyone else the Padres were interested in. I would have sent Marmol or Lilly or almost whoever the Padres wanted to get Peavy. But instead, Luis is shocked to see his favorite-to-win-the-division Cubbies in fourth place and under .500.  

3. Can we flip-flop: If missing out on Peavy wasn't bad enough, the Cubs virtually traded beloved Mark DeRosa for unbeloved Aaron Miles. If I had the power to give one single gift to Mr. Medina, it would be to make a trade right now sending Miles back home to St. Louis for DeRosa. I know it wouldn't vastly improve the club, but at least it would give Cubs fans a reason to smile and something to cheer about. There is something about DeRosa that just makes a baseball fan feel good inside. 

4. See you later: I would like to buy two tickets to Vanuatu (it's a small island-nation in the south Pacific). And I didn't buy them for Luis to take a vacation either. The tickets would be for my greatest gift of all. I would round up Phil Rogers and Kevin Gregg and send them on their merry way. With Phil Rogers gone, Luis could take his rightful place at the Chicago Tribune and with Kevin Gregg gone ... well that just makes everyone a little more sane. 

5. Make it rain: I am currently trying to track down Pacman Jones so he can make it rain on Hollywood. Someone needs to put up the money to make "Moneyball" a reality. I for one am not that excited for the movie, but it seems important to Luis and the only way I could see the movie being even better is to see Adam "Pacman" Jones name appear as the producer for the movie during the opening credits. 

6. The Bears get a QB: What's that? You say the Bears signed Jay Cutler? You mean the Pro Bowl quarterback right? Hmm .... Well then that wish has become a reality! It looks like while the other five failed to happen, this is true! With Matt Forte, a new defensive coordinator and a healthy offensive line ... well ...

It looks like you might have a happy birthday after all (though you will have to wait until September).

Your Problem Child For Mine: A Ben Gordon Sign-And-Trade Proposal

Chicago Tribune scribe K.C. Johnson thinks Portland could be a sleeper in the Ben Gordon sweepstakes. I think we might have a match if the Jail Blazers are willing to make a deal.

The biggest "duh" statement of the offseason is that the Bulls should re-sign Ben Gordon. Despite being undersized as a two guard and underwhelming as a defender, it is hard to fathom why anyone in Chicago would not want to bring back the team's leading scorer.

Gordon averaged 20.5 points per game. And could take that big-bucket making ability to rival Detroit to the tune of a 5-year $50 million deal. Which is similar to what the Bulls offered him right before his rookie contract expired.

$50 million in Detroit is different from $50 million in Chicago, I suppose.

Gordon returning to Chicago could be a key in what could be the next Bulls postseason run. Some think his presence in the backcourt will stunt the growth of Derrick Rose. I guess being able to spot up beyond the arc and drain threes after getting the kick-out from D-Rose is really detrimental to the team's well-being and to Rose's growth as a player.

And if Gordon does leave Michigan Ave. for 8 Mile Rd., how will the Bulls replace his numbers. They're not getting Hedo Turkoglu, and Shawn Marion would have fit the system three years ago. Drafting Wayne Ellington would have been nice, because if you expect guys like John Salmons , who is coming off a career year, and the unreliable Luol Deng to carry the offensive load, then you're going to be very disappointed.

That's why the Bulls need to desperately find a sign-and-trade partner. Rumors of a Gordon-for-Rip Hamilton swap came up not too long ago, and that seems like a realistic, if not ideal move. But here's an idea from outside the box.

How about Gordon to Portland for Greg Oden and leftovers? There are a few salaries that could work, here.

The Trail Blazers are hot on Turkoglu's tail, but might be left in the dust ... which is why they are apparently also targeting Gordon. And if there is any truth to the rumors that Portland tried to swing a deal for Shaq, that shows how much faith they have in the former Ohio State Buckeye center.

So, Portland, on behalf of Bulls GM Gar Foreman, I propose your problem child for mine.

Gordon would be another quality scorer you could team in the backcourt with Brandon Roy, while ridding the team and that town of Sam Bowie, Jr.

Meanwhile, the Bulls could add a true center who projects to be a 14-point, 11-rebound guy per 36 minutes, and if he stays healthy, could be a 20-10 guy that any team would want to build around.

Adding Oden would also allow Chicago to move Joakim Noah to his more natural position, power forward, and possibly help facilitate moving Tyrus Thomas out of town, as Chicago seemingly drafted his clone in Wake Forest forward James Johnson.

Oden isn't going to be a Hall of Famer right now, but adding an inside presence to a team that lived on the perimeter last season wouldn't hurt.